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Mob Mentality — Description

“I still don’t understand how someone as scrawny as Stuart Harper even got in the Bureau”

“Apparently one night the Mayor’s wife had a flat, she was really late for an important banquet or something. Stuart was just driving past on patrol and gave her a lift, she was so grateful she nagged her husband into calling in a favor and voila, Officer Stuart Harper who had done jack shit in his time on the force was now with us”

“Man, it was so embarrassing having a skinny little queer like him in the Bureau. We’re all real men here and suddenly there was this openly queer guy in our midst, it was sick. We complained and tried to get him fired but there’s all these stupid rules about getting rid of a faggot, so we decided to force him out by making his life a living hell”

“I know we spent every waking moment tormenting the guy, giving him the worst assignments, making him work very long hours doing pointless stakeouts, and always making him the butt of our jokes. But when Bureau decided to take down Dan ‘The Hammer’ Murphy, the biggest mobster on the East Coast, we needed a way in as every mole we’ve ever tried got found out within days, so we needed something fresh. Something…...more girly”

“We told Stuart that he was the only viable candidate, the ideal person, and he had been ordered to do this by the Chief. Not true, but that sucker believed it and orders are there to be obeyed by all cops. Every other guy in the Bureau is over 6’4 and built like a wrestler, try as you like you just can’t polish a turd so Stuart was the only one who could ever possibly fit the bill….and the shoes.

“At first he baulked at the idea but refusing an order from the very top would be instant dismissal and possible charges of obstruction of justice. All total bullshit but Stuart was an idiot and so agreed to the plan. Eventually we settled on giving him the name ‘Staci Lamour’ as it sounded cheap and slutty, and we decked her out in gaudy pvc leopard print as most Mobster sluts we’ve tailed seems to wear that shit”

“We laughed our asses off when he came back to the office wearing those trashy clothes, watching him practice walking in heels, trying to get used to the new weight on his chest. We made all the jokes about chicks with dicks, sluts with nuts, all of them. We even took bets on how long it would take before Stuart’s mouth was full of mobster cock, he had to be convincing so we had him practice for hours on all these dildos, being a fag we said he’s love that shit. Imagine it, we were tracking down serial killers and bringing down threats to our nation, and Stuart was sitting at his desk sucking huge rubber cocks wearing miniskirts and heels while we laughed. Man, what a loser.”

“We had monthly meetings with ‘Staci’ who gave us so much intel, so many details but, just for our amusement, we made Staci tell us all the humiliating sissy shit Dan Murphy made her do. Very detailed accounts of every kiss in his drug addled nightclubs, every handjob in his crooked casinos, every blowjob under the table as Murphy hammered out deals with Colombian dealers. It wasn’t necessary or needed but we loved how much ‘Staci’ squirmed”

“And at the way Murphy asked her to get bigger boob implants, not to mention the tattoo on the small of her back. It’s in pink italics and says ‘Daddy’s lil’ muffin’. I’m still laughing at that now. It’s weird, someone as vicious as Murphy, when he was with Staci he was so gentle and loving, romantic even, bringing her flowers and taking her dinner at fancy ass restaurants, buying her fine jewelry and treating Staci like a queen.

“At first it was four months, then eight, then a year until over two years had passed, we thought of pulling him out and prosecuting Murphy but the deals and criminal activities were getting bigger and bigger, with enough time it would be so big it would take down all the criminal activities on the entire east coast. A major coup for the Bureau, perhaps even medals and a presidential commendation for us all”

“Stuart’s been undercover as Staci Lamour for over two years now, he’s gathered so much intel on the Murphy gang and their entire network. Staci was on hand for major drug shipments, gun running, extortion, you name and she was so trusted she was there for every single criminal activity of Dan ‘The Hammer’ Murphy for the last 26 months. Staci’s testimony will disable the entire network and his entire Murphy gang will be behind bars for a long, long time. This is gonna be good”

“Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the court….. in the two years I was with the defendant Dan Murphy I witnessed…..nothing! Not a single criminal activity from him or any of his associates, not a parking ticket, not so much as an overdue library book. This whole investigation has been a complete waste of taxpayers money and I urge you to charge my superiors in the Bureau with gross incompetence, criminal neglect and a total disregard for the law. All this evidence I’ve supposedly given over the last two years was entirely fabricated by my superiors at the Bureau as a ruse to ruin the good name of a fine upstanding member of the community. They are the ones who belong behind bars….not my hunny-bunny”

“Your what, Miss Lamour?”

“My hunny-bunny……. Dan Murphy…. the defendant Your Honor…..and it’s not Miss Lamour anymore ….as of yesterday it’s Mrs Murphy”

“I see. Mr Murphy, you are hereby cleared of all charges. As for you Agents of the Bureau, every single one of you is hereby being held for contempt of court prior to a full investigation and criminal charges being brought. Bail is denied for all of you and will be incarcerated at Riker’s Island until your day in court, which may be a good two years or so seeing how deeply this corruption goes. Bailiffs, take these men away to the cells. Mr Murphy you are free to go”

“Come on hunny-bunny, it’s nearly time for our one way flight to a country with no extradition treaty. All your money has been forwarded, it’s time we finally celebrated our honeymoon”

“I love you so much Staci, now come here, babe. Daddy needs his lil’ muffin”

“And Daddy’s lil’ muffin needs her hunny-bunny”