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Ward - Empty Eyes — Description

Once inside her room, Ward crumbled to the floor, pawing at teary eyes. Cruelty was ringing in her ears, rampaging through every space of her mind. Hard sobs wracked her body until her chest hurt. And once the dam broke, it just kept breaking further. She cried until she was empty. Until the thoughts burned themselves out and she couldn’t remember what the hurt was for anymore. A hazy relief that wasn’t worth the flood.
In an effort to focus on something - anything else, she looked around the room. She realized the lights were off. The dark corners of the unlit room watched on in eerie silence. Pitifully, a fear gripped her then. The shadows saw everything.
Before anything could pounce on her, she stood and rushed for the light switch. With the dark now banished, she could relax. Whatever happened it was over. Details were absent from her memory. She didn’t want to remember.
It must have been the shadows again.
Ward looked down and saw black smears across her knuckles. And what looked like inkblots all over the front of her dress. Was it mascara? Was she wearing that much? She’s so hopeless – what was she thinking putting all this makeup on? It didn’t look good on her anyway.
The sound of drops spattering against the floor rang out as she slowly approached her vanity. Was she still crying?
Looking in the mirror, Ward recoiled. Her eyes were pitch black. Stains all over her face and streaking down her cheeks. Like a horror movie monster.
Frantically, uselessly, she rubbed at her eyes to no effect - other than more sticky smudges all over her palms. Panicked, she started scratching and digging her claws into the black. Into sockets. She felt nothing. It was terrifying. Why was there nothing?
She blinked and all of a sudden her room was gone. She was somewhere unfamiliar. An endless floor. Bright, blue-green lights from nowhere were trained on her, everything else was endless pitch black. Shadows. Alive and restless. She felt them watching her.
She had nothing to lose.
Ward danced in the middle of the room, spotlights dazzling on her. Everything outside was shadowed - rows and rows of watching shadows. But for once she didn’t care. Completely calm, she swayed through the room, the crowd of darkness giving way under the light she tread. A music pounding in her heart, she hummed.
They were glaring, they were whispering, they were watching. It didn’t matter.
…
All of a sudden, she was aware of a hand on her waist and a hand in hers. The surprise broke her out of her humming trance and she could see him clearly now - those familiar black eyes. It was Kill. He was dancing with her. Was he here all along?
She could swear she saw the shadows flinch.
Calm as ever, he spoke. “We were so close, weren’t we?” Ward didn’t reply, she didn’t even register what he was referring to. He sensed her confusion. “Bringing me back.”
Oh. Oh, right. Ward hummed awkwardly in some tone of agreement. Everything was hazy, this all was a dream. Just before she was… she was trying to give him a body again…Right, he was dead…
It’s odd. She didn’t really feel much recalling that.
“You can still help me.”
Kill was here killing her dream. She wanted her dance back. That was impossible now though - the veil couldn’t be unpierced.
“You can stay here forever. I just need your body, before he finds me. Once I’m free he’ll die, and this will all finally be over. He’ll get what he deserves for betraying us.”
‘He’? Oh, right. Him. The one shadow Ward dared to call a friend. Him.
“...You think that will work?” She murmured.
“Of course. Trust me.”
Trust. Ward glanced away from Kill’s face. The shadows were writhing. The shadows were crying. Collapsed black eyes crying. A familiar sight rang in her mind.
And she felt violence in their eyes.
“Please.” Kill called out, strained but loud. “You have to.” Ward repaid his pleading by simply staring back at him.
She saw through his facade then. His stiff movements, his shaking hands. He wasn’t calm at all.
Ward smiled half-heartedly and looked him straight in the eyes.
“We’re already dead,” she said, as she let go of him. The light flickered out and the shadows pounced.
---
While dying, Ward experiences something strange. A mix of memory, hopelessness, infinity, and relief. Perhaps that's called a dream.
Not sure I'd call this canon, but it's on the cusp.
I was feeling very inspired listening to some songs (this is very common as evidenced by this PAINtober) and just wrote out this whole anthro Ward snippet in one go. I really liked how it turned out and then tried drawing something based on it - this was drawn in July, on my Ipad which for some reason (not having used it in a while I guess) it felt very awkward and so I leaned into the messyness. Not too proud of the drawing but I do like the scene.