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Finally

FIN.A.LLY

Me rn:
It is time.

To rant about a series I despise, I hate. To show the internet how vile and disgusting my rage can be.

But do I have to do it? Can I go through with it?

Maybe, I don't have to do this. I still contain my rage

Malachite rn:
But I can't....I can't.

I can't do it. I'm having second thoughts.

Malachite:

YOU MUST! FOR YOUR SOLDIERS! FOR YOURSELF. YOU CAN'T LET IT CONSUME YOU

LET IT GO!

Me rn:
Hey guys. Sorry I documented that whole exchange. Where was I? Oh yeah.

Another day, another rant. Today, I will rant on a reboot of a series done by Netflix I will never forgive them for.

Rebooting the Magic School Bus
*Eyes start to water*

*Cough* Sorry.

The Magic School Bus was a tv show that aired from 1994 to 1997, that was based on the books made by Joanne Cole RIP, and ran for 4 season before being canceled. Then the cancer that is Netflix revived the show and THIS abomination unto the Lord was born:
Look how they massacred my show :(

So let's get into it shall we?
The Plot
No plot breakdown this time as this show is episodic thus would not be necessary but if you insist:

The Magic School Bus was an educational show that taught kids about science. There. The reboot also tackles that as well.

Now onto....

The Lessons
The original show usually taught lessons like digestion, archeology, hypothesis, you know things that helped my a$$ in tests.

The lessons in MSG reboot (it'll be referred to it as this from now on) are just the lessons from the OG MSB but in a new fit of paint.

In the episode, "Pigs in the Wind", the class are doing the "The Three Little Pigs" story as a play and Dorothy Ann starts to panic after learning that Janet will be reviewing the play and posting it on her blog. So Miss Frizzle takes the class CONSTANTLY a forest where the wind-resistant properties of trees can be seen firsthand.

Sounds like the plot for "Gets Planted" when they're making the play, "Jack and the Beanstalk" and because their beanstalk is non-existent, Phoebe is turned into a plant and they go on an adventure learning about photosynthesis.
How convenient

"Claw and Order", an episode in season 2 is a blatant rip off of "In a Pickle" which ALSO had a trial and accused.

Nothin' But Net is when Arnold got stuck in the internet. Sounds like the premise for "Gets Programmed"

"Send in the Clouds" rips offs TWO episodes; "Kicks up a Storm" and "Gets Lost In Space". The latter having Wanda vacuuming up the clouds just like Janet was picking up space junk as "proof" she went to space.

Just why?

You couldn't be bothered to be original?

And before you say, "It wasn't made for you. It was made for kids," I was TEN when this came out. I had watched some of the episodes of OG MSB. I was the INTENDED audience and I saw the blatant disrespect.

Netflix should be ashamed of themselves.

But THE WORST episode this show made was this, Waste Not, Want Not, an episode on Utilizing Waste/Fertilisation.

They had parody version of Sir Elton John's "Circle of Life" at the end of the episode, composed by Arnold. You know the theme song of the well acclaimed animated movie The Lion King?

What the Flock Netflix?

Me and everyone else rn:
Moving unto.....

The Characters
The characters of OG Magic School Bus were the best thing out of this show. Arnold, Wanda, Tim, Keesha, Carlos, Phoebe, Dorothy Ann a.k.a DA and Ralphie, whom I absolutely did NOT had a crush on.
*Swoons*

Ahem. Anyway.

They all had personality to them. Arnold was the coward, Wanda was the brave one, Tim was the artist, Keesha was the voice of reason, Phoebe was an animal activist - I mean really nice, Carlos was the class clown and made most of the jokes, and DA was the book worm.

In the reboot however, some of it is changed.

Arnold's still a coward, Wanda is the nice one, Tim's an artist, Keesha's in fashion (for some reason), Ralphie's still an idiot, Carlos is still a class clown except his jokes suck except the one where he said "Water we waiting for" in "Send in the Clouds" and was the only time I laughed and DA is now an Tech nerd, like she's still a know it all but instead of books it's a tablet.

DA's into technology?

DA!!!!!

Did they forget this is the same girl who had a PANIC ATTACK in "Blows its top" when she lost her book bag which went into the ocean and she had them go on a whole goose chase for her book bag.

Did they forget?

This DA.
THIS DA!
MOTHAFLIPPING DOROTHY ANN HUDSON!
MA'AM "I KNOW EVERYTHING ON A PAGE" EXTRONDIRE
WOULD DO THIS?
WHAT?

The executives for this show had to grow up watching the Chinese version of OG MSB because ain't no WAY they would do this to my girl.

Me rn:
They also changed things like the class's FAMILIES.

Ralphie's mom was a doctor, Phoebe's dad was blind, Carlos dad was also a clown and Carlos had a younger brother named Mikey, Wanda's mother was a science writer and she had brother, Arnold's parents were there and he had cousin named Janet, Tim's parents, were there and Tim's grandpa had a bee farm, and Keesha had a grandmother.

Now, DA's parents got retconned to be story tellers and Ralphie had circus performing family members.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS???????

Also, Janet got a down grade.

She used to be a utter queen
To an utter b*tch
Why?

Also the class went from this:
To this:
What happened?

They don't even say their catchphrases anymore except Carlos and the new ones suck :(

I know you smart viewers noticed something is wrong between these two pictures. If the answer is Phoebe is missing, you're absolutely correct.

And I'll tell you where she went.
Where's Phoebe
Phoebe Terese is a French-Canadian and one of the original OG MSB class members. She was also one of my favorites. She was nice, wants to protect animals at the expense of her class mates and her arc in one episode was to accept her wacky teacher Ms. Frizzle.

She had moved from her old school and was basically new there so it was nice to see her grow to love her classmates and her teacher.

She was just the best.
And like some sick joke, they went to her, told her they had a surprise out back, placed her in the back of a van and replaced her with this:
You don't know the depths of my contempt I have for this character.

Jyoti Kaur is a nothing character. Her only character trait is that she's tech savvy LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THE SHOW!!!!!!!!

HOW DO YOU MESS THIS UP NETFLIX!!!!!!!

I at first hated Jyoti because she replaced Phoebe but I hate her NOW because she serves no purpose. Phoebe could've been in the show along with Jyoti and nothing would change.

But no, they just wanted to tick me off.

On that front, they succeeded.

Cause now it's time to talk about:
Netflix
Now, the reboot wasn't born from nowhere but I don't have patience nor time to talk about it. Here's a link to someone far better versed in it than I: https://naimolichildrensbooksblog.com/2018/09/30/the-magic-school-bus-rides-again-what-went-wrong/

Check it out.

Any who, Netflix picked up the series and production began. The series aired 2017 and ran for three seasons. Which is just funny to me. When me, my sister and my older brother heard the revival, we were excited.

Then the trailer came out and we were disgusted.

We watched the episodes and my hatred for this shizzshow only grew.

The animation isn't even good, I mean it got better but isn't good. The animation of OG MSB was amazing but this....

It looks like the animation from the game Episode.
Tell me they don't look the same.

Miss Frizzle
This is what Miss Frizzle SHOULD look like
This is what Netflix made her look like
Disgraceful

Now Ms. Valerie Felicity Frizzle a.k.a The Friz was the OG Frizzle who was then replaced by her OC shoehorned sister, Ms. Fiona Frizzle voiced by Kate McKinnon.

No comment.

Not gonna lie, Ms. Fiona Frizzle made me laugh twice. Good job. She wasn't interesting at all, just boring. Which is bad because she DRIVES THE FREAKING BUS!!!!!

She also was trying way to hard to be hippy and quirky when it came naturally from her big sister.

Also, what is this outfit?
Whoever gave her her Phd, I hate you now.
The Theme Song
The reverb in the new theme song for the reboot is two packs of a$$

It could never compare to the old one.

Let's compare shall we?
Which one will make you jam to it?

I rest my case.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I bet children did learn from this trash heap, I didn't. The Magic School Bus was revolutionary and I find myself going back to the show from time to time but the reboot? No.

This show is mainly why I hate Netflix and well....
This is Halaura, the one and only🥰